Musings

I wrote all morning on Wild Cards, and it was a productive three hours. I then went to ride, and found the barn in disarray. Exact is once again being ridden. Everyone is upset with the new help at the barn — the owners were concerned about not actually knowing whether our previous help were “legal” so they replaced Manual, Nacho and Juve with three white guys. Two of the three know nothing about horses. They don’t seem to care about the horses. They don’t want to learn about horses. The stalls are barely being cleaned. Blankets are being put on incorrectly as in straps not hooked which is a disaster waiting to happen. They don’t know the difference between alfalfa and grass hay. People are furious and looking to leave. And I’m about to look for a new horse.

I rode Rosella (Rosie) and since it had been three weeks we had to go through the negotiation about going on the bit. She will probably be better tomorrow. I strained my back a bit swinging the saddle up onto this huge horse. I’m still not totally healed. *sigh*

I came back after lunch to watch a clinic with Stephan Wolf and he was great. He rode for five years with Klaus Balkenhol and it shows. He took a stiff, nervous horse that wasn’t through his back and by the end of the forty-five minutes he was soft and supple and his gaits had gone from a three to a seven. I talked with my coach and learned she is not going to come over to Luna Rosa to teach. This combined with the problems at the barn left me feeling very nervous.

I had no food in the house so I drove into town to mail off Pi’s papers to his new owner and to shop for groceries. When I handed over the envelope I was suddenly overcome with sadness and melancholy. I officially no longer have a horse. The mess at the barn has me wondering just where I’m going to take my new horse, and where I can ride with my coach. She is located at a barn some 40 minutes away. Luna Rosa is five minutes away. I’m wondering if I’m going to find a horse that is more advanced than prix St. George. Will I find a horse that will make me happy. That will make my memories of Steppi recede. And then the sadness over losing Steppi came crashing in. It’s probably just reaction to coming down off my incredible trip to New York.

I decided to fall back on cooking as a channel for sadness. I’ve just been scrounging since I got back so I decided to treat myself to a good meal tonight. The menu was trout almandine. I adjusted a recipe in Paul Prudhomme’s cookbook, and the seasoning gave a real piquant flavor to the fish. I prepared wild rice, and asperagus, and I even opened a bottle of vouvray. This is the only white wine I like. Tomorrow I’ll do a chicken dish so I can have another glass. I’m such a wimpy drinker. One glass is my limit. It’s going to be a lot of fish and chicken for the next few nights.

The house seems very quiet. Gozar is in my lap and purring loudly as if he senses I need contact. Sometimes this cat scares me. He’s like a person in a cat suit.

Melinda

This entry was posted on Saturday, November 10th, 2007 at 7:58 pm and is filed under life. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.